Ep 97 - No Escape (1994)

[00:00:00] Speaker A: Unhappy with his workload, Robbins gives his abrupt notice to the military and spends his first few days of retirement on an island getaway trying to get away. [00:00:17] Speaker B: Completely overrated. [00:00:19] Speaker C: Hello, everybody, and welcome back to our Rating the show where I get together with two of my friends, we take a movie franchise, break it down by film, give an overall score, and then throw it back up on the board. However, this week is our Patreon pick, where you guys get to choose which movie we're going to discuss. And so this week we are discussing no escape from 1994 starring Ray Liotta. And unfortunately, I am joined by only Brian as Will is off gallivanting throughout the world. Brian, how are you doing this week? [00:00:45] Speaker B: Pretty good, I thought you were gonna say. Unfortunately, I've joined with Brian. [00:00:50] Speaker C: I. I got like halfway there. Not even as a joke. Just gonna happen. I'm like, oh, backtrack, backtrack. Don't be a dick. [00:00:58] Speaker B: Yeah, I'm doing pretty good. This week's been pretty busy. I got school starting up, so we're doing all the school stuff. We did meet the teacher today, and so I got here a little bit late. Sounds like you had some chaos in your household as well today. [00:01:10] Speaker C: A little bit. We had an open house this afternoon, and then there was some mix up between my wife and I and who was looking after the kids. So just a little bit off. But I actually just recently got out of watching the brand new Spider man movie, Brand New Day. Can definitely check out this channel for my review, but spoiler alert, I loved it. Now, obviously, if you've been watching this for any length of time, you know that I'm a huge Spider man fan, so that was probably like the least surprising thing I could have said. But regardless, go check that movie out. It's. It was so well done. But that's not what we're here to talk about today. We're going to discuss that later on Backseat Cinema. Right here, right now, we are discussing the Patreon pick, no Escape, 1994, starring Ray Liotta. I have to ask you, have you ever seen this movie before? [00:01:52] Speaker B: I didn't think that I had seen it before when it was described to me the name didn't ring a bell. I was thinking Ray Liotta. And I couldn't, you know, I was thinking good fellas, right? Is what comes to mind when you say Ray Liotta couldn't remember it. And then we. We get to it and yes, I have seen it. And I guess there's a reason why I forgot It. So just to. Just to kind of get a jump on the situation here. [00:02:18] Speaker C: Totally fair. Your background reminds me of like, final Fantas cloud looking up at the Shinra building. [00:02:24] Speaker B: Yeah, well, in the beginning of the movie, he goes to this immense facility that they spend like probably 20% of their budget on, and then immediately they vacate that and go to an island. So. Yeah, so I got this up here for it to resemble the. The first, I don't know, 10, 15 minutes of the movie. [00:02:46] Speaker C: Yeah, this. That's a great segue. I've also never seen this movie before, or I guess I've only ever seen. Never seen this movie before. Because you have seen it. This movie kept me guessing the entire way along because it starts off with his abrupt departure from the military and the opening credits. And then we see him brought to this, like, military complex and they're like. I guess it starts off with the opening crawl, which is like, the year is 2022, the distant future from 1994. And in this age, like, prisoners are. Our prison system is like big business with like, all the major corporations owning people and whatnot. And like, none of that makes any sense for the movie you watch anytime after that. Because, like, this. It doesn't. There's nothing in this film that requires it taking place 30 years in the future. Like, right. No technology of any kind, no reason for it. And like, the whole like, oh, prisoners are big business. That doesn't come up once they get lost on an island. Like, they're trying to kill as many of them as humanly possible. They're not trying to keep them alive. [00:03:44] Speaker B: And honestly, I had. I had huge issue with the whole prison systems are big business nonsense. It doesn't need to be in the film. You need to write a better plot point than that because there's no. There's not a good excuse for why these people are on this island. What they're doing with the prisoners, none of it really makes sense. Their excuse just doesn't add up. To me, it was a huge plot hole. And them going from the high tech facility out to the island didn't make any sense either. Especially when you find out who else is there and why they are there. You're like, what this, this kid got sent to the island because he was like the backseat driver of the. He was the driver for the getaway of a crime and didn't hardly do anything. And he got this maximum crime where our hero straight up shot a dude in the head in front of everybody and then also got himself into more Trouble. Once he got to the facility, that's what cost him to get. And even that didn't really make any sense. You would think that they would just send extraordinarily violent people to this island and drop them off to get rid of them. Yeah, that's not it. [00:04:52] Speaker C: Well, as I was saying, like, this movie took me on a ride because I did not know anything about this. We kind of just came in, like, random. So it starts off, you get this, like, prison movie. I'm like, okay, this is gonna be a prison break story. We're gonna be trying to get out of the prison. Makes sense. And then 10 minutes at absolute most later, you never see that prison again. You're gone. You're on this island. He's getting dropped off on this island. You're like, okay, let me finish my point. And then they bring out, like, tribes people, and I'm like, okay, this is going to be, like, surviving the game. Like, it's going to be him versus, like, 50 people hunting him down. No, they take him to a civilization. You're like, okay, this is feeling kind of mad, Maxi. Like, water world. Like, here's an ancient. Or not an ancient. Here's a dystopian civilization. No, he leaves them and he finds a hippie commune. And he's all of a sudden, like, hanging it with the father. And I'm like, what is happening in this film? Like, every 10 to 15 minutes, it felt like he was just changing tones so drastically. [00:05:47] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:05:47] Speaker C: Just like, okay. And then even at the end, there's like. I don't want to say a twist, but, like a point where I'm like, cool, this is the ending. [00:05:54] Speaker B: Nope. [00:05:54] Speaker C: It continues on for, like, 10 minutes. You're like, what? [00:05:58] Speaker B: Yeah. And they. They even make a point of explaining that he has escaped from other prisons. Like, he's an escape artist. Almost like he's. He's good at breaking out. Right. So you think that's what it's going to be all about, and it really isn't. Isn't at all, actually. So it was. Yeah, the plot is all over the place on this and was probably the biggest factor for me, where I had such huge issue with this movie. None of it really makes sense. You don't know where it's. I don't mind the twists and turns so much. It was interesting how they traverse different sections and do different things, but at the same time, you're just kind of like, what are we going for here? [00:06:40] Speaker C: The. The fact that it was keeping me up in my toes much like the original Mad Max, where I was like, I don't know what this story is yet. That actually keeps me more engaged. Like, if they just stayed at the futuristic prison and it was just him being addict to his superiors, I probably would have lost interest even faster than I did because it's just very monotone. So the fact that it was like, and now we're throwing this at you, and now we're throwing this. Like, my brain is constantly engaging, like, wait, what are we doing now? What is this film now? And like, most of the film does take place at the hippie commune, so it does kind of like land like, okay, now I understand what's happening. It just took us a second to get here. But even then, I'm half the time looking at most of the people at the hippie commun. Like, why are you in the, like, island of Misfit Toys? Like, I don't understand how you guys went to the maximum security prison in the first place, let alone were so hardcore that they couldn't handle you at the maximum security phase and sent you to this place. Like, the kid is one thing, but realistically, all of them there were just [00:07:33] Speaker B: like, yeah, like 80 or 90 of these guys turn a. A dystopian wasteland into a kind of a utopia almost. They had everything. It was a fishing village with all kinds of tools and stuff that they'd made and crafted. They were. I mean, their clothes actually looked pretty cool for homemade stuff. Like, it wasn't just trash. It was really well sewn together stuff. So it was kind of weird because, like, why would these people end up on this island in the first place? So this whole backdrop, this whole setting that we're dealing with is a mixed bag for me. One, I enjoy the transition through all these places in the world building that goes on. It was kind of cool, but I couldn't get my bearings at the same time. So it was a little bit of a mishmash for me. And to pivot to something else that was both good and bad at the same time would be our main villain. Our main villain had. Was a great character. I loved his enthusiasm and his style and everything else, but he was absolutely not scary to me in the slightest. So on one hand, I really like the character, but he's not doing it for me as a villain. I felt like he should have been the. The second in command of a truly evil, dark villain. And. And he would have just been that comedic relief, that sarcastic attitude. And I think it would have been a lot better. What did you think of our main character. I don't even know what his. Can't remember his name was. [00:09:03] Speaker C: Yeah, I know which one you're talking about. The. Stuart. Stuart Wilson. Merrick. [00:09:06] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:09:06] Speaker C: Is the guy's name Merrick super charismatic? Super charismatic. Not exactly. Like, not terrifying in any way. Not scary. Like, I don't really understand how he is in charge of the commune that he's in charge of, because, yeah, there's much scarier people there now. He is more charismatic than maybe some of them. Probably smarter than some of them, but in that society. I don't understand how he doesn't just get his throat slit at some point. [00:09:30] Speaker B: I think just because he had the [00:09:32] Speaker C: gun, which is fair. But then he lost the gun at the beginning of the movie. So, like, Right. If you're somebody under him who's like, I'm not happy with this guy's leadership. I mean, I guess we do get the one, like, taser face guy who. Who does step up and is like, why are you leading? Or something. Gets his throat cut. So, yeah, maybe that was that. [00:09:47] Speaker B: And. And wasn't there a point he. He said that he went and he, like, killed all the heads of the tribes to unite them. Right? It was like. It was like a line, a single line in it. He dumped some heads on the ground and he's like, all right, I'm the boss now. And that was it. But you kind of felt like he was the boss from the beginning. You never saw that structure. It was just like this one scene where he dumps some heads on the floor and he's like, I've eliminated all the other gang leaders. You're now under my command. That's it. And I don't. I'm not sure. Did he even have the gun at that time? I think. I think he'd already lost the gun, too. [00:10:22] Speaker C: I think he had a sword or his knife or whatever it was. [00:10:24] Speaker B: It didn't even make any sense then. So, yeah, the plot is just so full of holes. [00:10:29] Speaker C: His character feels like the type where, like, you should have had a. Like, you're saying like a bigger boss or even, like, the jail warden show up and he cowers underneath him. So, like, he is the big fish in a small pond, but he is not a big fish. And instead they're just trying to play him off as being, you know, the biggest and baddest on the school lot. And you're just like. You're just not, though. I just do not get that from you whatsoever. [00:10:53] Speaker B: Like, the character, fun character, but just not scaring me. It's not selling the point. Yeah. [00:11:00] Speaker C: This could get cut if it doesn't work. Did you ever play Fallout 3? [00:11:04] Speaker B: Yes, a lot. I'm a huge fan of the Fallout franchise. [00:11:07] Speaker C: So, Fallout 3, same kind of thing. You're on a jungle island and the villain is. Same kind of thing. Like, he's this charismatic guy, but he's also a sociopath. And you get the feeling like this guy will murder you just as easily as he would, you know, cross the street. That is what this character was missing. [00:11:24] Speaker B: Like that. [00:11:25] Speaker C: That edge to him. He had the charisma down. Great acting job, but just not intimidating in any way, shape or form. [00:11:34] Speaker B: Yeah. Speaking of acting, I think there were some good points in the acting. What's his name? [00:11:41] Speaker A: Bean. [00:11:42] Speaker B: The father. He. He was pretty good. I didn't have a solid grip on his character, but I think he played it well. Ray Liotta has some great moments where he did a lot of staring off into space. And they kind of pushed that sequence too much for my taste. But Ray Liotta did it well. You know, he. He had. He was a tormented soul, and he. He did that pretty well. So that was okay. It just. Again, they pushed it so much, and it didn't need to be that much in the film. You just need to know that he did some things he felt regret for. You know, that was really it. [00:12:18] Speaker C: They had a lot of staring off into the sunsets with them, but then they also had a lot of, like. Because he. [00:12:23] Speaker B: He. [00:12:23] Speaker C: His superior ordered him to, like, burn a village with, like, women and children. [00:12:28] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:28] Speaker C: So, like, we get those, like, PTSD moments. [00:12:31] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:12:32] Speaker C: Which looked so awful. Like, they're just. [00:12:35] Speaker B: They look like Judgment Day scenes from. From Terminator 2. Like, it looked like the burning. You know, when Sarah Connor has her dreams of the bomb dropping. [00:12:43] Speaker C: I think it looks significantly worse than that. [00:12:45] Speaker B: Oh, yes, it did. It did. It was like. It was like. It was like the Teemu version of that. [00:12:49] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. This was like a Windows screensaver from, like, Windows 94. Like, it was bad. [00:12:55] Speaker B: It was bad. [00:12:57] Speaker C: But that was his ptsd, and, you know, so be it. And I get the story they're trying to tell, but it just. It was just awkward. And then. Yeah, like you said, you got him talking to the other people and, like, what the other people have done. And, like, one guy created a bomb. Didn't set the bomb off, didn't kill anybody, but he created a bomb. So he's going to supermax jail, and you have one guy who drove the getaway car for a kidnapping. That's it. [00:13:20] Speaker B: That's it. [00:13:21] Speaker C: Going to super Max jail. You're just like, I don't. Like, I get that it's big business, so it's probably one of those things where, like, everybody's getting arrested for literally anything they do, because the more people in jail, the more money you get. But then if that's the story, why are you putting these people on an island that nobody knows about and we have to have it satellite protected so nobody can find out about it, and the prisoners are killing themselves off and you don't really care. So, like, are they worth money or like. Like the whole plot just makes no sense to me whatsoever? [00:13:48] Speaker B: I was like. I was like, okay, maybe they're taking these prisoners in and receiving money to take care of this prisoner, but then they just drop them off on this island and don't use the resources, right? They just pocket the money for it. That's what I was thinking. And I was like, well, then you're already pretty heartless. Why wouldn't you just euthanize these people? Or what's to what's. You know, is there maybe a tracker device that lets you know that they're alive so you can't kill them. You got to keep them alive. But then they don't care if they kill them off on the island. They're not interceding there either. So, like, I can't find a way to make this plot work. I just can't. [00:14:22] Speaker C: It, you know what, set some cameras up around the island, have it be a reality television show. Look at all these guys killing each other. And like, now we're getting sponsorship ads on top of getting paid, right? Like, something like that. And be like, okay, that's weird, but [00:14:33] Speaker B: yeah, Death Race at least published their race to the Internet and sold some money for these criminals driving cars around, shooting each other. Yeah, that kind of made sense, you know, at least enough that I was like, okay, I'll watch these guys drive around and shoot guns. [00:14:47] Speaker C: Yeah, exactly. It was something, this one. It almost felt like they set up that plot and then turned around on it so quickly. It's just like, why didn't you just not set up the plot? Like, just like, hey, this guy's a bad guy. He's going to prison. That's all I needed. Like. Like, it's. It's a movie about a guy on an island. Like, get. Just put him on the island as quickly as possible. [00:15:01] Speaker B: Why spend so much of your budget doing this futuristic, fancy, high tech cgi prison system that you don't even use. That you don't even use. You know, it's just weird. [00:15:14] Speaker C: The Double Helix helicopters were kind of cool. And, like, those are like, actual, like, Russian helicopters that they just used because they looked futuristic. [00:15:21] Speaker B: Yep. [00:15:21] Speaker C: Okay. But, like, outside of those helicopters, this movie could have taken place in 1994. It really could have. There was no reason for this to be 2022. [00:15:28] Speaker B: Yep. Did not need to be a futuristic film. [00:15:32] Speaker C: Weird side note, one of the few, like, things I looked up on this movie that was actually kind of interesting. Movie takes place in 2022 stars Ray Liotta. Ray Liotta passed away in 2022. Just one of those, like, one of the odds kind of things. Like, you were gonna set a movie 30 years in the future. [00:15:48] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:15:49] Speaker C: I mean, he dies in the movie. That would have been weird. [00:15:51] Speaker B: But Ray Liotta wanted to star as a hero because he wanted to get away from the. The shady villain type that he had been kind of cast before. So he took on this role, which was still kind of weird because in the opening sequence, he walks over and shoots a dude in the head, and he's the hero of our film. Which also, that. That didn't really jive with the character that we ended up seeing. I was like, this just doesn't seem like he would do that. It doesn't. [00:16:20] Speaker C: It doesn't feel very heroic for, like, I want to play a hero character. [00:16:26] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:16:27] Speaker C: Like, anti hero at absolute best. But even then, like, do you like this character by the end? [00:16:33] Speaker B: Not really. He's kind of an asshole. [00:16:35] Speaker C: He's kind of an asshole. And like, the best thing he does is tell the little kid, like, piss off. And then, like, all right, I'm here begrudgingly to help protect the village. [00:16:44] Speaker B: Speaking of begrudgingly, Martin Campbell, the director, actually turned this down twice before he took it up. I thought that was kind of hilarious. He actually needed money to buy a house, and so he had to do the film. [00:16:57] Speaker C: Turned it down twice, and was like, you know what? I could use a paycheck. Sure. [00:17:00] Speaker B: Yeah. Money's tight. [00:17:03] Speaker C: Sometimes that's what makes it happen. Sometimes that's what tws the wheels. We were talking about in the Watch Party. There's a scene with all, like, the old, old computers in there. And I think you actually made the joke like, oh, look, they must have bought all these computers from Jurassic Parker or something like that. [00:17:19] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:17:20] Speaker C: The actual room was more designed to look like Alien, ironically, and even use, like, sound design from the Alien movies to make it kind of fit in with those, which is kind of interesting. But right after that scene, we get them flying towards the island and I made the joke like, oh, no, it actually is just Jurassic Park. Like, that's where we are right now. Turns out this movie actually did use cutting room floor footage from Jurassic Park. So I wasn't wrong. That was actually Isla Nublar from Jurassic Park. [00:17:46] Speaker B: Oh, my God. [00:17:47] Speaker C: Oh, my God, I was right. Don't question me on Jurassic park, guys. I know what I'm talking about. [00:17:52] Speaker B: Hey, you know, they're being thrifty, I guess. Points for that to recycle. And I did notice you said some of the sounds throughout the film. I was like, I know that sound clip. Like, you know, there's like the rusty door opening sound that you hear in hundreds of movies because it's a copyright free sound and it sounds good as a rusty door opening. And like, you don't know it, but if you heard it, you'd be like, yeah, I've heard that in dozens of movies. I heard so many of those little sounds in this film. I was like, man, they didn't. They didn't reach out far. They didn't try hard to make any of their own sounds for this or anything. They just recycled stuff to try and save some money. That's fine. But you know, when you're really trying to make a Masterpiece movie, you usually try and generate that stuff yourself. They're not trying for a Masterpiece movie here. They're just trying to create a quasi escape movie. [00:18:43] Speaker C: I mean, they're trying to make something on a budget. And even then they didn't manage to make their goal because they made this for 20 million. And as far as I can tell, it brought in about 15. So. [00:18:56] Speaker B: Yeah, it did. It did gain some traction later on vhs and it has become not a cult classic, but kind of like one of those movies that people. Everybody knows about it kind of loves to hate on a little bit. So it's. I guess it's okay. Man, there's a lot to hate in this movie, though. Speaking. It's other. Speaking of other plot holes, the. The boat that they try to design to escape with. Oh, and their whole thing is it needs to reflect the thermal energy so they can't see the heat signature. And then they put a V8 into it with like a flaming exhaust coming out the back. And I was like, what happened to the heat signature? What's going on? [00:19:43] Speaker C: And like, people in the chat were like, well, it'll just go faster than the satellites. I'M like, I don't think you know how satellites work. Like. [00:19:48] Speaker B: Yeah. Is it going to go missiles, the helicopter shooting at it? Terrible. [00:19:56] Speaker C: You're gonna. Yeah. You got a satellite looking down at you. You got helicopters chasing you and missiles shooting at you. Your boat's not gonna cut it. I don't care how many V8s you have in it. Like, the whole thing was just so dumb. [00:20:06] Speaker B: Yeah. And. And then like they. They don't really even try to use the boat in the end. It's more about just kind of like Ray Liotta accepting that he's found a place. [00:20:18] Speaker C: They just needed a goal. [00:20:19] Speaker B: I don't know. Yeah, they need a goal, I guess. The movie's just all over the place, man. It just really is. However, I kind of did have some fun watching it. Even though it was more like I was having fun trashing on this film. It was still. I don't know, the pace of it was pretty good. How they keep changing scenes. You keep watching, trying to figure out what's going on. It's always moving and changing and there's stuff happening. And so it did entertain. I will give it points for that. [00:20:48] Speaker C: Yeah. I will say this was fun because. Excuse me. Because we were in the Patreon watch party because we're hanging with a couple people because we're kind of like cutting this up in real time. I don't know that I would have stuck with this one if I was watching it by myself in my baseball. Absolutely not just by myself. I don't think I'm making it the two hour watch time. I'm just. [00:21:06] Speaker B: Yeah, there's a reason I didn't commit this one to memory. I don't need to. It's fine. [00:21:10] Speaker C: Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Other just random thing that I was thinking about. This entire film is like the hippie commune is made entirely of wood. The walls, as best I can tell them, are dried leaves. And they've got fire arrows that they're shooting at them. Why do they even charge? Why even get within range? You're shooting fire arrows at a dried wood structure. Just give it 10 minutes. [00:21:33] Speaker B: Even their armor was made out of wood, man. Like, this is a straw man village. Just set it ablaze and walk away. [00:21:41] Speaker C: The first guy, because when he first gets to the. The. The hardcore village, I don't you want to call it. And they're like, we're gonna play a water game. You're gonna fight this guy. And he just like chucks a knife and it goes right through. That guy's wearing Armor too. Was he not like like armor but still leather armor? [00:21:56] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:21:57] Speaker C: Just chucks a knife at him. Instant death. You're just like, yeah. Oh, that did nothing. I don't know this movie. Am I happy that I saw it? Sure. Did I have a good time with the watch party? Absolutely. Was this good? No. [00:22:14] Speaker B: Okay, before we get to our rating here of this film, we do have to talk about the one biggest Rudolph the Red nose in the entire film, which was the Nerf gun that everybody's fighting over with that ridiculous twirly looking painted missile on the front that they get. They get one shot with this gun. It's a, it's a mini little rocket launcher. It really looks like a Nerf gun that they painted black and stuck a missile into it. And that's like to the point where [00:22:49] Speaker C: they cock it by like doing this action. Almost like they're like building the air up to shoot the rocket. [00:22:54] Speaker B: I'm curious how many times they actually cocked that gun in the movie. Because everybody who picks it up goes every single time. And I'm like, at some point it's just going to break. Guys like stop it. [00:23:04] Speaker C: It's like a dad at a barbecue. Like you pick up the tongs. You have to like you can't not like you pick up that gun. You have to just in. [00:23:11] Speaker B: Yes, everybody does it. And it was just the dumbest looking gun right from the jump. It just looked so stupid. Just give somebody a 1911. Just give somebody a 1911. Just a regular pistol, you know, a Luger. I don't care. Ridiculous missile launcher. [00:23:27] Speaker C: In the land of the blind, the one eyed man is king. If you've got no weaponry whatsoever, all you need is a Desert Eagle and you're king. You know what I mean? Like you don't need this gigantic weird rocket launcher thing. [00:23:39] Speaker B: They could do it. So proud of that. It would be fine. Yeah. [00:23:43] Speaker C: Like on all of the promotional material for this movie, front and center is that red rocket gun. Like they're just like, yeah, this is our baby. It's like, okay, look, that's not the way I would have gone with it, but all right. [00:23:54] Speaker B: And what's so stupid is like that's the thing that's putting Merrick in charge from the beginning. He's waving it around. It's a missile launcher. Go fist fight him. Go fist fight him. He can't shoot you. Like it's so dumb. Like it just again, plot does not make any sense at all. [00:24:17] Speaker C: It was just so that at the very end of the movie they could Shoot it the one time and basically blow up the entire village. Not kill anybody. Seem to survive. [00:24:25] Speaker B: Yeah. [00:24:26] Speaker C: But there was a real big explosion that didn't hurt a single soul. [00:24:28] Speaker B: Yep. It was just unbelievable. Absolutely unbelievable. And what was also unbelievable is how did that village not burn down after the initial attack? [00:24:40] Speaker C: Right. [00:24:41] Speaker B: Like it was still there. It didn't even look charred at that scene. Like they needed it pristine to blow it up. Dumb. So dumb. [00:24:50] Speaker C: Yeah, I. I just really don't have more to say. [00:24:55] Speaker B: I don't have any more to say either. Yeah. [00:24:56] Speaker C: I realized this could be like the shortest episode ever. Maybe Will. [00:25:00] Speaker B: That's it. Well, we're short one person. Do we have any clips from Will? He didn't watch. [00:25:04] Speaker C: Have a review from Will. Yeah, he watched it without the watch parties. Poor soul. [00:25:09] Speaker B: Let's. Let's hear what Will has to say. I'm curious. [00:25:12] Speaker C: Poor guy that Will is. Before going off on vacation, we forced him to watch four Terminator movies and this in close succession so that he could send us all of his stuff in like the course of like two weeks or something. It's just like, sorry, guys. [00:25:25] Speaker B: Like the title of the movie. There's no escape. [00:25:29] Speaker C: If you like what we do and you want to help support us, consider joining our patreon. There's a link down below. Shout out to our producers as well as our executive producer, Dino. And a huge shout out to our head writer, Real Bubba Hotep. If you'd like to join the head writer program, you too can choose a movie that we will roast for half an hour. [00:25:47] Speaker B: Okay. The plot really held this movie back. It got such terrible, terrible scores for this plot. I wasn't super excited about the direction of the film. Some of the choices that they made. The effects were mid sound was okay being they kind of stole everything from. It did have some good acting, just not the greatest thought out characters. And that kind of falls into that whole direction writing section. I had fun watching the film. Not a lot of fun, but it was mostly because we were kind of tearing it apart in the chat while we were watching it. This movie comes in at a 46 for me. It's not one you should watch unless you're really into quasi prison escape movies or Ray Liotta films. I guess. I can't really think of any reason why you should go see this. Anything that's 50 or above is worth your while, but this just doesn't quite make the cut. So I guess, yeah, 46. For me, it is what it is. [00:26:49] Speaker C: I don't know what to say about this film that I haven't already said. My enjoyment factor from this literally came from hanging out with Brian and ripping this movie apart and watching this in the watch party and tearing this movie apart. This is maybe something I would have enjoyed in 1994 if I'd seen it and kind of found it and discovered on my own. But watching this for the first time in 2026, this movie did very, very, very little for me. Ray Liotta and Hendrickson, I think his name is, are. Are both fine actors and did a decent enough job, but they weren't enough to carry this film for me. Also, sorry again. The villain, William Wilson, I think his name is Merrick. Very fun to watch. Not really giving me villain vibes, but fun to watch regardless. The visual effects in this were. Were pretty brutal. The plot in this was pretty brutal. The whole concept of the movie just annoyed me more than anything else. Bubba Hotep tried his best to find something that would make Highlander look good, and he succeeded. I would happily watch Highlander before I would watch this one. I have really high highs. I have really low lows. This one's a 24 for me. This was just not my bag whatsoever. [00:27:55] Speaker A: Hey, big thank you to our Patreon writers for choosing no Escape for this month's Patreon pick. I had never heard of no Escape, never seen it before. So after watching it, I was eager to jump on the Internet and do a little research. I really only gleaned two interesting elements out of that research. One, this movie was loosely based off of a novel entitled the Penal Colony. And I say loosely because they took a lot of liberties when writing the script and changing the story. Secondly, Martin Campbell, the director of Goldeneye, Casino Royale, the Mask of Zorro, he turned down directing this movie twice. On the third time, he decided, okay, let's direct this movie. I need to buy a new house. That pretty much sums up the movie for me. I felt the characters lacked a lot of development and so the drama didn't really pull me in. I felt the action sequences were a little rough around the edges and the pacing could have used some work. So I wasn't really on the edge of my seat. And the story as a whole, I just felt was underdeveloped and a little under baked. So for me, this is a take or leave it movie. It's a 50 out of 100. It's not bad. It's. It's just not good. So take it or leave it. That's. That's it for me. I hope you guys all enjoyed this movie or enjoyed our review of it. Back to you, Dan and Brian. [00:29:26] Speaker C: And with that, we see no Escape, making the absolute bottom of our singleton list, coming in with a score of 24, 46, and 50 for a grand total of 40, which means I made Bubba Hotep happy because this is a lower score than Highlander and Will happy because this is a lower score than Rumble in the Bronx. You're both welcome. [00:29:48] Speaker B: And it's. It's none of Will's doing either. I. I can't believe Will gave this a 50. A 50 is technically a pass as far as I'm concerned. Like, it is as low as you can go and still get a possible recommendation from me. And I can't believe Will gave it a 50, because I just. I can't recommend this to. For anybody to watch unless you want to make fun of a movie. And there's better movies to make fun of in every category. There's a better movie than what this is. [00:30:16] Speaker C: I can't stress this enough. The only way I would recommend this movie is join our patreon and watch it along with us in the watch party. Other than that, it's Hard Pass. Hard pass. [00:30:26] Speaker B: Yeah. I'll say this. In the end, no Escape gave me about three hours of smiles. So that movie, though. [00:30:37] Speaker C: Yeah. All right, that's our rating of no Escape, but what's yours? Leave a comment down below. I'd love to hear from you. Were we way, way too harsh on this movie, or did it get the exact score it deserved? We record this live over Twitch tv, the Mongolie Show. So if you want to head over there, hit the follow button. You can hang with us live while we roast movies like this, or if you're watching this on YouTube and you made it this far, probably enjoyed it. Make sure you hit the like and subscribe buttons. We see you in the next one.